Sunday, October 15, 2006

Farewell, My Lovely

I regret to announce that yesterday afternoon, in the first game of Killer Klein Croquet ever played on the East Coast, I lost possession of the Frog to my father, Alan Klein, who becomes our new Interim Grand Champion.* Dad claimed an immediate lead and held it throughout the game, thanks to an easy course and several incredible wickets-in-one,** and even withstood a late attack from my Uncle John, who was trying to guard the final post for Aunt Carol. In the end, though, Dad took the Frog back to Missouri, where he will doubtless grow fat and happy rooting for the Chiefs and feasting on barbecued flies with Gates's sauce.***

Goodbye, my sweet Frog. Be safe and enjoy your Midwestern sojourn, and I'll bring you a slice and a hot dog the next time I come home. And Dad, remember: Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown . . .

* "Interim" because there will never be a permanent Grand Champion.
** The magic of my Harry Potter cap, no doubt.
** The Frog, not my dad.


  1. Gates may be good (better than good, even), but we love Daisy Mae's (which now has a seating area as well).

  2. "A slice" is New York vernacular for a particular kind of slice of pizza: thin crust, dripping with cheese and grease, barely any sauce, no vegetables, no nutritional value whatsoever, served on a grease-stained white paper plate by a wiry guy in a Yankees cap and a plastic apron, available 24 hours a day, seven days a week at your nearest fluorescent- and neon-lit pizzeria: the perfect bite before a late movie or after a few beers, always hot and delicious: two bucks.

  3. Ah, thanks for the clarification. I'd be more partial to a slice of cheesecake.

  4. Cute dad, and the frog is bigger than he looks on TV!

  5. Your dad is a cool head in sports skills and obviously is superior in eye-hand coordination than the rest of us. But I would rather put it down as God's Will and Devine Intevention. He has never been that good previously. Fate moves the Frog again. Someday he may live in Iowa, briefly.
    --Uncle John

  6. Query whether your sister will be allowed to play in the future, now that she's a Jackson. Come to think of it, query whether if she had three kids, they could have a team called the Jackson 5.

  7. Oh, the fickleness of frogs! :D

    There must have been some magic in that Potter hat he wore. For when he placed it on his head the Frog was yours no more. ;)

    When can you hope to win him back?

  8. Certainly Melissa can still play. We've actually let Joe play for years, and he doesn't have a drop of Klein blood in him.(Incidentally, Melissa refers to her hypothetical future children as "Tito" and "LaToya.")

    The next game in which I can participate will be either at Thanksgiving or Christmas. Bring it on!